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Post by Amadeus Marovich on Feb 14, 2007 19:41:02 GMT -5
It was night again.
It had been too long since the pack had gone without a meal, and unfortunately, no trespassers had dared venture to the island. He had refused for a day or two to go to the mainland, but he knew he couldn't refuse his pack a feed forever.
So finally, he had agreed for a small group, himself and two other lycans, to venture to the mainland, but no farther than the forests. They had agreed to bring back food for the others, although everyone had wanted to go on the hunt. He picked only the two best, and soon, the trio of wolves was running full speed through the forest, parting their ways temporarily to scavenge for a possible wanderer who happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.
*Don't wander off* he ordered, and although he couldn't see any of the others, he knew they could hear him. He was more focused on stayin on track than usual. He needed something to occupy his mind, and a kill would be the perfect thing. He only hoped he would be the first one to find it.
His wolf body sped through the trees at tremendous speed. As he touched the ground here and there in leaps, his massive body made quite a large thump since he wasn't really bothering to conceal his presence. Any human around wouldn't be fast enough to escape him, so there was no point wasting his evergy in trying to be quiet.
He stopped abruptly. He had caught the scent of something. He couldn't tell what yet, but he looked around, his ears pointed up and stature tall and strong. He was high on alert, ready to contact the others with an update on what was going on.
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Post by Arkile Sernagova on Feb 14, 2007 20:06:06 GMT -5
The night was cool and Arkile needed fresh air. The castle was stuffy and boring. She left it and began walking, wandering the forests. She was headed for the shore... for the island of the lycans. However, before she was half way there she ran into one of the clan. The lycan had been prepared to kill her, but upon recognizing her they relaxed.
'Arkile, fancy seeing you here. You left awfully abruptly.' Arkile felt a pang of guilt as the venom in the lycan's words hit home. "I'm sorry... I just thought that it'd be easier if I didn't say goodbye. Less painful. I guess I was wrong." She looked down at the ground in shame.
'Eh, don't worry about it. We all get it. No hard feelings. I was just joking. Hey, did you see Amadeus?' Arkile's breath caught. She didn't need to breath but she made it a habit. "Amadeus is here?" The lycan nodded it's head. "I didn't know... I'll... no... I shouldn't bother him. I have to get back to the castle anyway. Tell him I said hello, would you?" Again the lycan nodded.
"Thanks." With that she headed off again, but she wasn't really going to the castle again. She was hoping to spot Amadeus at least from afar. She stepped through some thick pine trees though and practically ran right into him. She gasped and clutched her chest. "Christ! Amadeus." She reverted back to her normal self for a fraction of a moment.
Then her cool composure came back. "How have you been? How is the clan?" She was shaking in her bones, but she was trying her hardest not to show it. Seeing him, she just wanted to run over to him and hug him. She wanted to cry and beg him to let her live with the clan again. She wanted to be her old self. Before she remembered her past. However, she wanted to run back to the castle too. She had a job to do, but seeing him she just wanted to throw it all away.
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Post by Amadeus Marovich on Feb 15, 2007 6:18:52 GMT -5
He clearly heard the movements of some two legged creature through the pine trees. He launched himself in that direction, stopping short when he recognized the slim figure of the vampiress. He snarled loudly, half angry that he hadn't known it was her, half suprised.....and well, almost laughing at what she said.
He debated whether to go back to his human form, but figured it might be easier for both of them if he remained low to the ground and a few feet away. It would make it easier right? *I've been fine. The clan's hungry* obvious answer there, but he wasn't sure what else to tell her. He had been rather quiet since she had left, surely noticed by the rest of the clan, but he didn't neglect his duties as a leader. He was no harsher or no easier on anyone. At least he was good at one thing, separating his emotions from duty...that is, if he ever had any emotions.
There was something strange about the way she stood. Perhaps it was just because he was used to the careless, youthful vampiress, and not the stately Queen. But she even looked different from when he had last seen her in the lycan caves, not so long ago. This conversation had so far been awkward, but he wasn't really sure how to break the cycle without seeming weak or desperate, or something along those lines.
"How's the palace life been treating you? Are you...alright?" that last question was linked to the way she seemed different to him right now. He hoped he would get straight answers, but from her, he could never really be sure.
*Hey Amad, Arkile's around*, Amadeus snarled again, this time slightly angrily. *Yea, I figured that out already*. "You ran into the other's?" he figured that would be an appropriate topic of discussion. Surely they had hesitated to tell him because of his unusual behavior, and although he should've understood their reasoning, he was simply angry about it.
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Post by Arkile Sernagova on Feb 15, 2007 15:23:40 GMT -5
Arkile felt like crying. Why? Could she really not be around him without her emotions welling up? Her life with the clan had been so good, so free, so fun. Even when Amadeus was being emotionless, which was whenever he wasn't being angry. With the clan she felt so safe, protected. At the palace she was constantly looking over her shoulder. She had remembered her past, but the palace still felt unfamiliar to her and dangerous.
Amad asked about palace life and if she was alright. He actually seemed a little concerned. That made Arkile happy, but at the same time guarded. What was she doing wrong that was making her seem vulnerable? She sighed. "Palace life is strict, demanding, orderly. It's fine." She was lying through her teeth. She hated it. She always felt like she was being watched, judged, plotted against. It was making her paranoid and stressed out. Life with the lycans had never been like that.
"As for if I'm alright... why wouldn't I be?" She asked him. She paused a moment though, watching him a few feet away, crouched. It was like her was ready to dash off at any moment. Could he really not stand to be near her? Suddenly, in staring at him she felt a small piece of her mask fall away. The pain of thinking he didn't want anything to do with her anymore made her crack just a bit. "I'm miserable." Arkile whispered.
She looked away and then sighed. She had said something she shouldn't have. She wasn't particularly worried that he would fret over her happiness, but n the off chance he did she'd feel terrible. "My people are happy though and so... slowly... I'm adjusting and feeling better." She added that, hoping to lessen the blow of her surprise statement. "Zeion is protecting me well... I don't know where he and I stand right now as far as the fact that we were engaged before... Our current relationship is confusing."
"Other than that... I'm healthy physically." Not mentally. She didn't know what else to say, but Amad growled and asked if she had run into the other lycans, distracting her from digging up more to talk about. "Yes, did they just mention they saw me? You seem a bit angry that they didn't tell you sooner. Did you wish not to see me?" She wanted the straight forward answer this time. Did he mind seeing her or not? Was he glad she was gone or did he want her back?
All of her muscles went rigid as she waited for a response. She would be heart broken if he said he didn't want to see her. She'd cry - from happiness - if he said he had. With Amadeus you could never tell though. He rarely showed any kind of interest in anything.
((ick, sorry it's crap. I still don't feel well.))
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Post by Amadeus Marovich on Feb 16, 2007 6:57:41 GMT -5
Amadeus listened carefully, and although nothing special stuck out from what she was saying, there was something about it he didn't like. He couldn't tell whether it was the way she said it or because he sincerely or unsincerely believed that she would be happier with the clan, but there was definately something off there.
I'm miserable
Those words hurt more than they should have. In fact, everything was hurting more than it should have. He was almost hoping he hadn't seen her. After all, through this huntring trip he had been hoping to get some peace of mind. But that certainly wouldn't happen with her appearance in the forest. Right before him on top of it.
...we were engaged before...
No wonder he had wanted her back, wanted her to remember? They had been engaged? He felt a wave of anger overtake his body and he had the urge to break something, bones preferably, but it was clear that wouldn't be very well taken by Arkile. He restrained himself, although it was difficult, and there was a glimmer of his teeth in the shadow of a tree as he felt the light rumble of a growl in his throat.
He shifted into his human form. Maybe it would be easier to control himself. Or maybe it would be easier for her to depict what he was feeling by her expression. Oh whatever.
When she asked that last question, he seemed outraged. Had he not made that clear? After allowing her to live in the clan for so long? Had he not made that clear by allowing her to leave when she regained her memory? As far as he was concerned, he would have only done that for her....since he was a rather selfish creature.
He decisively walked over to her, clearly angered for some reason. He clutched her chin in his hand and stared her in the eyes, pulling her face close so that he could make his point once and for all. "Do you really think that I would even be standing here right now if I didn't want to see you? If I didn't want you around, do you really think you would have stayed on the island for long? Don't you ever dare believe that you're not cared for!"
He pushed her away. His actions defiantely contradicted his words, but it was probably for the simple reason that he didn't know how to act around her. He didn't know how to be gentle. He began walking away, refusing to let his anger get the best of him, although it probably already had.
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Post by Arkile Sernagova on Feb 16, 2007 21:01:47 GMT -5
Frightened. Despite her vampiric strength Arkile was terribly frightened when Amadeus grasped her chin tightly. Tears sprang to her eyes. She had seen him angry before, but something about this... she'd never seen him like this before. If her heart had still beat it would have beat itself right out of her chest. He was so close and so upset.
"Do you really think that I would even be standing here right now if I didn't want to see you? If I didn't want you around, do you really think you would have stayed on the island for long? Don't you ever dare believe that you're not cared for!"
Arkile couldn't believe his words. No... it hadn't been made clear. Not to her. "How could I think otherwise, Amadeus? You never showed any emotions except anger and apathy. You rarely smiled and when you did it was hardly noticable." Arkile was openly crying now. His anger had broken her walls down completely. Amadeus was walking away. She ran over and grabbed his arm to spin him around.
"I'm sorry that I questioned if I was cared for." She was whispering now. She slid her hand down his arm to his hand. "I never should have doubted. You were always the best leader. Strong, confident... always putting the clan and their happiness first. You... always seemed miserable though. Always mean." Arkile stopped, realizing how much that description fit her too. She looked down at the ground and sighed.
Arkile dropped his hand and started off herself this time. How could she lecture him about something she did herself? "This might seem hypocritical... no, I know that it is now... but try to worry about your own happiness once in a while too. Maybe then people would know you care for them better." She didn't even turn around to say it. She couldn't... because he might notice she meant that she needed to try it too, so he knew she cared for him. She started walking again, a little lost in thought.
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Post by Amadeus Marovich on Feb 18, 2007 18:22:25 GMT -5
He listened to what she had to say, even though he was walking. He couldn't believe she was crying for some reason....why did that suprise him? Perhaps he was realizing for the first time how emotionally involved she was in this situation....and it touched him. It shouldn't have. He wondered what it was to cry suddenly, having not done so in years. He wondered what it would be to simply let his emotions run wild.....to be a kid again.
You... always seemed miserable though. Always mean
He stopped walking when he felt her touch. He didn't even get angry or upset by that comment, simply because he knew and admitted that she was right. But he had done that for the good of his clan. He had to be strong, ruthless. He had to be. And as long as it worked for the clan, as it had done so far, he had figured he'd done the right thing. At least until now. Maybe there was another way. But would it be too risky to take the chance? Of changing himself... was it even possible? This is absolute ridiculous....Unacceptable!
He wondered what would happen if she died right there and now. Would that end the strange aching in his heart? No...Never he could never let anything happen to her. He couldn't explain why, and didn't dare to ask himself. There were just too many questions. But he had to decide. He had to decide what he wanted and stick with it. That was the only way to succeed. And he finally knew what he wanted.
He stayed silent for a moment as she began walking, but then uttered the words he never thought he could say "I've never felt happier...than when you lived with us Arkile" why did those words hurt so much? He did not like the feeling. Maybe he should stop...no, he had to do this and do it right. "I want to be happy....and I have a feeling that'll only happen.....or it has something to do with you" he wasn't really sure if he was making any sense. He didn't dare look at her.
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Post by Arkile Sernagova on Feb 18, 2007 18:57:41 GMT -5
Her footsteps froze as Amadeus spoke. Had she just heard him correctly? First he hadn't been upset with her words and then... he said that? She replayed his words a moment, still too shocked to quite believe them. "I've never felt happier...than when you lived with us Arkile. I want to be happy....and I have a feeling that'll only happen.....or it has something to do with you."
Her whole body felt warm and tingly. She smiled to herself involuntarily. Did she dare to turn around though? As it started to sink in, his words, she sighed. She wanted to tell him she'd never been happier than when she was with the clan too, but... she had a duty to her people. "I don't know if I can come back, Amadeus. I have my own people to worry about now, a whole life that I was forced to leave behind."
Not that this was much different. Her old life was forcing her to leave behind her new life that she ... honestly... liked better. "I want to come back though, really." She added, turning now, her eyes still glistening a bit. "I love the clan. I love not having to look over my shoulder constantly. At the palace... I could die at any moment. They've tried it twice before, they might learn by the third attempt."
Arkile closed her eyes and hung her head. "Still, I can't leave. I can't leave before I know my people are in good hands. Even if I lived with your clan, I would be a vampire first and foremeost. Even if I've never been happier than when I was with the clan too." She looked back up at the lycan before her, pain clear in her gaze. "I have to be... responsible. I have to... make my mother proud wherever she is now."
She hated it. She hated being torn between duty and her heart. For the longest time she thought that was so cliché and unrealistic. In reality though, it happened. You loved something, someone, but responsibility got in the way. It was only cliché because it happened so much, but so few people had a choice in the matter. At least if they had any morals at all. Staring at Amadeus though, Arkile wished she didn't have morals, didn't have a sense of duty.
'You better be proud of me mom. I'm giving up everything that makes me happy to take care of that which you cared for most in life and that which I decided long ago to care for as well... even if it makes me miserable forever.' She thought to herself, hoping her mother was listening in Heaven or Hell or wherever it was she ended up.
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Post by Amadeus Marovich on Feb 18, 2007 19:22:56 GMT -5
Amadeus had not expected that answer. His face, which had momentarily softened returned to it's normal, serious expression. Of course. He should have known. She wouldn't come back for him, even if he had said the most ridiculously emotional thing in his entire life. He felt like an absolute fool. He opened his heart just in the slightest and felt hurt so much. He couldn't understand why.
He tried to tell himself that at least she wanted to come back.....but that didn't proove to be enough to comfort him. He felt humiliated and wasn't going to stand for that.
He raised his head up high and glanced at her one more time, his gaze the coldest it had been in the year she stayed with them. Very well then he thought If that's what she wants, then I can't force her.
"Do what you must" his voice was cold, deep and monotone. He was desperately trying to forget what he had just said. It was just....so stupid of him to even fathom that she just might come back with him just for the sake of being with him while her people were happy. He had no reason to stay. In fact, it was hurting him to stay.
He lunged foward, away from her, turning into his wolf form and disapeared into the trees. He needed to kill someone now....and nothing was going to stop him.
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