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Post by Manuelle Pearce on Mar 10, 2007 16:47:55 GMT -5
Manny really hadn’t expected Razier to open up to him. He thought that she would ignore what he had said and hit him again, trying to get back to fighting. But instead she actually listened to him, pouring everything out. His hearts ached as she spoke with tears running down her face. He had no idea that she had been through so much. He felt stupid, thinking that his high school drama was so terrible when she had much much more going on in her life. He and his sister were only making it worse for her.
It was just one sad story after another and Manuelle wasn’t sure what to do or say. She had lost her charges, her parents, and her love all in the span of her short life. He was lucky that the only that had happened to him was that his girlfriend cheated on him. She had a lot of aggression stored up inside of her and it was rushing out in front of him. Hearing her talk about killing herself made him want to cry too. “It wasn’t your fault that any of these things happened. You shouldn’t be so hard on your self.” Finally she broke down and Manny knew that he couldn’t just stand there watching.
“Hey, hey, hey…” He kneeled in front of her and used the bottom edge of his shirt to dry her face. He wasn’t going to tell her not to cry. It was good for her to let it out and she needed it. “I’m sorry…for everything. I’m sorry that I asked you to spill. I’m sorry that I’m making your job harder for you. I’m sorry that your parents were killed. I’m sorry that you’re not with Rhodes.” He might be an ass but he wasn’t cold hearted. Leaning forward, he hugged her letting her cry on his shoulder if she wanted to. “Honestly Razi, I don’t know what to say. You’ve been through so much and lately I’ve been acting like my world is coming to an end.” He knew that they didn’t get along much but he wouldn’t let her feel like she was alone. “I know that you hate me and whatever, but if you ever need anything…an ass to kick to let out your anger…I’m here.” One thing about Manny was that he was genuinely caring. Underneath his huge ego he had an even bigger heart, he just didn’t want anyone to know about it.
OoC: Craaaaapppp…
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Post by Razier Immori Tempest on Mar 10, 2007 17:15:10 GMT -5
Razier was surprised when, instead of letting her leave, Manuelle kneeled and wiped her tears away. He hugged her and she stiffened, but only for a moment. Then she just slumped against him and cried more. It felt good to cry, even if it was from pain. From sadness. He apologized for a lot of things that weren't his fault. She wanted to stop him, but she couldn't speak, her vocal cords were too strained.
Who would have expected Manuelle to be so kind? Certainly not Razier. In fact she doubted it even as he hugged her and let her cry on him. She wouldn't admit that to him, lest he be offended. Still, she did doubt to herself. She couldn't help it. She doubted everyone as it was and he was a jerk to begin with so it was harder to believe his sincerity.
After a while her crying ceased and she pulled away, sniffling a little and wiping at her cheeks. "Sorry. I don't mean to be a hassle. I don't mean to soak your shirt either." She looked away, ashamed at her weakness and then managed to get to her feet. Another flash of pain hit her chest and she groaned, but she didn't fall back again. She made her way to the living room, but no further.
Razier sank onto the couch, hand clutching her chest. She was breathing heavy, but tried not to show it, forcing herself to breathe deeper. "So, don't leave me hanging. For all i gave you, unload some of your baggage too." She said, closing her eyes and curling up, grabbing a pillow and hugging it to her chest.
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Post by Manuelle Pearce on Mar 11, 2007 20:38:00 GMT -5
Occurrences on this island kept taking Manuelle by surprise. As cold as it may sound, the last thing he expected was for Razier to show any emotion. Now here she was crying her heart out on his shoulder. His shoulder of all shoulders. Despite how strange this situation was to him, he continued to comfort her to the best of his ability. He had been a jerk to her since he met her. It was the least he could do.
“Don’t apologize,” he said with a soft smile. “And I’ll just make you buy me a new shirt…no, I’m just kidding. Tears make for great fabric softener…” His jokes were stupid but he hoped to elicit a smile out of her. Even if it was because his jokes were dumb. He noticed another painful grimace on her face that seemed to have nothing to do with her emotional pain. Before he had the chance to ask her bout it she got up and walked in to the living room.
Without asking, Manny plopped down on the couch right next to her. “Oh, here we go.” Manuelle rolled his eyes and laughed. “I was hoping that you had forgotten about that.” He paused for a moment, thinking of where to begin. “Wel, after everything that you just told me you’re probably gonna think this is stupid, but a deal’s a deal.” Whether it was stupid or not, he secretly wanted to tell her anyway. Manny had been holding in how he’d been feeling and was very anxious to let it all out.
Taking a deep breath, he began. “Ok…When I was 15 I met Raquel. That was at the end of my sophomore year. I met her through a mutual friend. We hung out almost everyday that summer and we ht it off really well. By the middle of junior year we were the most serious couple in school. Things were perfect with her, you know? I loved her, she loved me. We were both doing really well in school. It was great. Our friends even envied our relationship.” As Manny spoke he smiled at the memories. Raquel had been his everything and being around her made him feel in a way that words couldn’t describe.
“But all of that only lasted for a short period of time. Soon things with her got really weird. Nothing I did was ever right. She was always getting angry with me, always giving me the silent treatment. She was controlling and clingy. I couldn’t take it, so I started hanging out with my friends a little bit more. It was only meant to be temporary, but I noticed that she was doing the same thing. Finally, we just stopped seeing as much of each other as we used to. I just put up with it because I thought that’s what she wanted and I was willing to do whatever it took to make things work.” At this point, being with her did more harm than good but he was so naïve that he stayed. “Have you ever loved someone so much you could cry? Have you ever need someone so badly that you couldn’t sleep at night? That’s how I felt about her. I loved her so much that I couldn’t breathe when I thought about her. She was everything to me.”
“Our relationship never went back to the way it used to be. We lost the ability to talk to each other the way we did before. Our relationship became purely physical for a while. She wouldn’t talk to me at all. But I never stopped loving her. Never. I tried talking to her about it but she always said that she loved me and that I had nothing to worry about.” Manny felt kind of stupid telling her all of this. His high school relationship problems probably seemed very petty and foolish to her, but he couldn’t help how hurt he felt.
The next part of his story would be the hardest part to tell. While people knew that they were having issues, no one had any idea that things were this bad. “After our graduation I was on cloud nine. I couldn’t have been any happier and I was determined to change things between Raquel and I. There was a graduation party held by this guy Jordan and I hadn’t really planned to go. You see, I hate…no loathe… I loathe Jordan. When I was a sophomore I was supposed to be the youngest captain in history on our basketball team. Jordan was second best to me. The night before our first home game, Jordan fouled me pretty badly and I dislocated my shoulder. He openly admitted to me that he did it on purpose…out of Coach’s presence, of course. I had to sit out more than half of the season. I lost my position as captain that year. That was so important to me. Basketball was my life.”
The story was getting lengthy and slow now, but he was intentionally trying to delay the next part. It had been what hurt him the most. “Ok…I gotta stop beating around the bush. No one had expected me to go to the party because of how much I hate him, but went anyway because I knew that Raquel was going and that some of my friends would be there. I got there and know one would tell me where she was so I started looking everywhere for her. I wanted that night to be our fresh start. I finally found her in his bed. They were…” His voice cracked a little and he looked away from her. He felt weak and ashamed that he had ever let this happen.
He couldn’t bring himself to say it. The image was repulsive. “The next moments were a bit of a blur. I just remember beating the shit of him and then yelling at her as she put her clothes on. I went straight home and drank myself into oblivion. I was so depressed after that. I didn’t leave my house for 3 weeks. I barely ate. But the worst part about it was that I felt so stupid for not realizing it sooner. I later found out that she had cheated on me with him for a year and a half. She came to me a few days before I came here and asked me to forgive her and take her back. Before I could make up my mind, I was brought here.”
His story may have seemed ridiculous to her but it really hurt him. He couldn’t ever remember crying the way he had when he went home after seeing Raquel with Jordan. He sighed as he finished speaking. “Well, you can laugh and tell me how stupid I am now.”
OoC: That had to be the longest worst (if that makes sense) post that has EVER been written in all eternity!!!
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Post by Razier Immori Tempest on Mar 12, 2007 21:38:54 GMT -5
((ooc: by the way that rocked so shut up! XP))
Depression sank in even harder as Manuelle plopped down beside her and started on his baggage. He might think his problems were stupid, but Razier... didn't. Oddly enough. She thought they were very very painful. So painful they even hurt her just hearing them. As he asked if she ever loved someone so much she cried or needed them so much she couldn't sleep she looked down at the floor. "Honestly? No." She said quietly.
He continued on. His voice cracked. Razier's heart ached for him. Especially after he said what she did. After he just glanced over the events afterward. When he was finished he told her she could laugh, tell him how stupid he was, but she couldn't. It wasn't stupid. It wasn't funny. "I can't." She admitted.
"It isn't stupid Manuelle... what she did was stupid. You loved her and she betrayed you. There is nothing amusing in that. It... must hurt a lot. I can't even imagine it. I've never loved anyone. Not even Rhodes." She was quiet a moment and looked over at him, fresh tears skirting her eyes. "I'm incapable of it. I swear. There was no reason for me to not love Rhodes and still I didn't."
"There were other men. Other people. I have never loved anyone. Not even like family, Manuelle." She sighed and looked away again. Then unexpectedly she wrapped an arm around his shoulders and gave him a light squeeze. She wanted to be a little more helpful, but she just... didn't know how. Unfortunately she had this urge to curl into his shoulder and start crying again, but for who? Not herself.
She never pitied herself that much. For him? Well what good would her crying do him? Razier looked back over at him sheepishly, not really knowing what to do or say. "You know... if you get the chance to go back and make that decision... in time I mean... Don't forget that you deserve someone who won't hurt you. Yeah you're a jerk, but you still don't deserve to be treated like that." She crack a small smile, lame as it was.
She took back her arm and sat awkwardly. She wanted to end the silence, but was afraid of breaking it at the same time. There was something in the air that just made her feel like one word could make or break the whole world at that moment. She was far too inexperienced with being caring and ... sharing... to know what would make it and what would break it so she just stayed quiet, staring at her feet brushing over the rug.
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Post by Manuelle Pearce on Mar 16, 2007 17:39:33 GMT -5
Manuelle was very grateful that Razier was understanding. He could tell that she was feeling a little of what he was feeling and it made him feel a bit better. “I don’t believe that,” Manny said when she said that she was incapable of loving someone. “Everyone can love. Maybe you just haven’t experienced it yet. Maybe Rhodes just wasn’t the one for you. There are reasons to love. It’s not something that can be controlled and when it happens you’ll feel amazing.”
He was a little surprised when she put her arm around him, but he appreciated it nonetheless. Even if she didn’t understand completely, she was trying. “Thanks,” he said when she offered a bit of advice. He knew that’s what he had to do, but the question was whether or not that person was out there. With everything that happened with Raquel, he put a guard up and it would take a lot to break it down.
Now the moment was a bit tense and he knew that she could feel it too. He briefly wondered where his sister was but then brought his thoughts back to the present moment. “What happened between you and Rhodes? I mean, you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to…I was just a bit curious.” He knew that this would be a rough topic to talk about but he actually liked talking to her like this, believe it or not. He knew that there was more to her than the tough persona she fed him; it was just a matter of discovering it.
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Post by Razier Immori Tempest on Mar 16, 2007 18:13:45 GMT -5
Razier chuckled a little when he said someone was out there. If he was he was somewhere far far away where she would never go and he would never come to the island. Life wasn't that kind to her. Often she felt maybe it was because she didn't deserve it. She didn't deserve happiness with all the mistakes she had made. She even thought perhaps in a past life she had been a very evil person because she had been punished since she was a child. She lost her parents, her home...
Razier sighed. She was being too critical and pessimistic. Too dramatic. She had had some good things happen to her too. She had her own home now, a chance to help the island. What was she complaining about? Not having love in her life? Well how important was that? She had lived without it for seventeen years, what was the rest of her life? Manuelle asked about Rhodes, but Razier was caught off guard so she took a minute before answering.
Finally she spoke up, "Rhodes... Rhodes and I met while I was training to be a guardian. I had to be... wow... eight? He was hanging around while his mother worked with some guardians and trainees. I was hanging out too, taking a break because I had morning training and it was almost nightfall." Razier pulled her knees up to her chin and wrapped her arms around her legs. "We got along well. Or rather he put up with me being distant and gave me my space."
"Until we got engaged. He asked me when I turned fifteen. I was young and grasping for anything resembling love. So I took his offer. Immediately after he started caring more about how I went about protecting my charges. I became more reckless like I was fighting it... He became more possessive. He asked me constantly to stop being a guardian and I just continued and took on more harmful missions." Razier smirked, almost pleased with her self-destructive nature. Really it was just how pathetic she was. It amused her.
"I took on one I couldn't handle though. I neglected them and they needed protection around the clock. They got killed and... I broke down. Rhodes asked me to stop being a guardian again. I threw the ring at him, told him I hated him and never wanted to see him again. There were a few other choice words thrown in. He just took it." She shook her head. "I pushed him away more and more for months. Then finally I apologized, but I still wouldn't see him very often."
"And that's how we've been since. He still loves me, that's what he says anyway. I can't fathom it after what I've said and done." Razier pouted a little and turned her cheek to her knee so she could see Manuelle's face. "I'm not made for a relationship. I am far too rebellious. I believe Rhodes used the term untouchable when I so nicely gave him back his ring."
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Post by Manuelle Pearce on Mar 20, 2007 22:51:44 GMT -5
Under regular circumstances, Manuelle would have found Razier’s story hard to believe. But Razier wasn’t a regular girl. He could almost feel the pain Rhodes must have felt when trying to get through to her. Loving Raqule was easy, almost too easy. That was probably why their relationship went awry. Relationships required work. If things were too easy something had to be wrong. No pain no gain.
“It seems that Rhodes was more of a brother or a friend to you than what you were to him. You shouldn’t feel sorry for how you were feeling about him. You can’t control that. Maybe he’s just not what you need in a guy.” It was awkward sitting here telling a girl who had just finished beating the crap out of him relationship advice. He didn’t even had his own advice to follow. He was sure Marielle would have a heart attack if she saw them like this. He almost couldn’t believe it.
“Don’t think that I’m going to stop being an ass to you after this. This hasn’t changed anything.” He made a serious face but he couldn’t hold it for too long. Within seconds he was laughing. “You know I’m just playing, right? It’s cool talking to you like this, even though we clash most of the time. It’s good to know that you’re sane enough for me to come talk to.” Hehehe…
OoC: crrraaaappp...
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Post by Razier Immori Tempest on Mar 23, 2007 19:01:38 GMT -5
you're just chasing shadows show us some heart and confess your sins we'll sing with arms closed and you can tear us apart cuz you won't break the skin
just put on your face and...
i would love nothing more in the world than to watch you as you spill your guts. unrehearsed you're just a silhouette you never had a voice so why all the fuss?
Not what she needed in a guy? Then what did she need? If caring, tolerant, passive, stable wasn't the guy for her then who was? Someone who treated her like crap? That's great. Razier could see herself needing someone like that. Someone who yelled at her, beat the shit out of her, etc. Great relationship there. Razier looked back up as Manuelle said he wasn't going to change his attitude toward her.
He quickly laughed though and said he was just kidding. Razier sighed, but showed him a small smile. "I really... wouldn't expect you to act any differently. I don't mean to say I think badly of you. I just mean I wouldn't ask it of you." What would she ask of him? To keep being an ass to her? To treat her badly? She got so annoyed by it, was she saying she would ask him to keep her angry and stressed?
Talk about self-torture. Talk about sane. She wasn't sane. Clearly. Another sharp pain hit just under her ribs and she doubled over with a groan. "Damn it." She muttered. "I... have to get home." She stood up slowly, grimacing and teetering on her feet at first. She needed to get home and see if she had anything to help her get this poison out of her system. She had checked once before, but maybe she missed something.
Sure she liked to torture herself. Liked to feel pain. That didn't mean she wanted to die though and the pain was getting worse and more frequent. That normally indicated that this wasn't a harmless poison that made her ill for a while and then dissipated into thin air. It indicated it was probably going to get worse until it claimed her life. She wasn't ready to die and give up the pain yet. She had more damage to do to herself and more to do to help the island.
She tripped and slammed into a small wooden desk at the end of the hall nearest the livingroom. She hissed through her teeth and braced herself against the wall with one hand. Razier then continued walking toward the doors. "I'll look for Marielle while I'm out," She said with a clenched jaw, trying not to betray how much pain she was in. She was stronger than that. She could handle it. "Stay put."
you can have the kingdom, you can have the crown, but you wanted the people. no, or else you drown.
put on your face put on your face and scream
you're just chasing shadows show us some heart and confess your sins we'll sing with arms closed you can tear us apart cuz you wont break the skin
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Post by Manuelle Pearce on Apr 4, 2007 22:57:55 GMT -5
Razier was probably right. Manuelle probably wouldn’t be ‘nice’ to her even though they exchanged a few secrets. It didn’t change the fact that he was still on the island against his will. It didn’t change the fact that he wanted to go home. For that he would always be angry and unfortunately, Razier was a likely target. He couldn’t think of anything honest to respond with; being an a**hole wasn’t something he liked to talk about.
He noticed that she was in pain again and this time it seemed worse. As she stood, a bit unbalanced, he almost felt the urge to catch her if she fell. He was genuinely concerned for her but it didn’t look like she was too worried so he let it go again. Razier was without a doubt the strongest woman he’d ever known, both physically and emotionally.
When she tripped and fell her rushed to her side. “Hey, are you alright?” That was a dumb question. It was obvious that she wasn’t, but Manny wasn’t one to think before speaking. “I don’t think that it’s a very good idea for you to go.” Sure, he was a jerk, but that didn’t mean he was a bad person. He knew that she would probably protest and say that she was fine. But what would he do if she had decided to stay? He had no idea what was wrong with her. “Here, just tell me what’s wrong and tell me how to help you, but I really can’t let you leave. You might collapse or something out there and no one would know it. You’re practically defenseless in this state. What if those demon chicks try to attack you? I know I’m not your favorite person, but you gotta trust me on this.”
OoC: Sorry it took so long. I was unsure of what Manny's reaction should be... =/ And I don't have any cool lyrics or poetry to go with my post either...
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Post by Razier Immori Tempest on Apr 4, 2007 23:22:48 GMT -5
((ooc: no worries. I just threw mine in as an after thought. I was bored.))
Razier nodded as Manuelle agreed that he probably wouldn't act any differently. She expected nothing more of him. She understood he didn't like being here and he was going to be upset by it for a while if not forever. She completely understood it because she'd been there. She still hated being a guardian, but she was forced into it and that was that.
When Manuelle came over and asked her to tell him what was wrong she shook her head. He wanted her to stay there. While he had a good point there was nothing in the hideout to help her. "All I know is that Ace poisoned me. How to fix it is the problem. I don't know a way to. I want to go home and see what I can find there. I've already looked, but I might have missed something."
Razier shrugged and started past Manuelle, but another wave of pain surged through her and her knees buckled. She cluthed Manuelle's arm and gasped audibly. After it passed she moaned, annoyed. Another hit almost immediately. Her knees gave out completely and she fell down. "Shit." She could not afford this sort of complication. She had to get some sort of remedy for it before she was incapacitated constantly.
How could she take care of Manuelle and Marielle - train them if she kept getting pain like this? It wasn't that bad until they started fighting. Maybe that triggered it to work harder. Gods damn the demons. Now it was just a downward spiral. She had to get home. Maybe there was something in the attic with her parent's stuff. Anything. Anything would be nice right then.
((eh, short. crappy. i have to go to bed.))
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Post by Manuelle Pearce on Apr 5, 2007 22:20:38 GMT -5
“Fucking demons!” he mumbled under his breath. What reason did they have for doing this to Razier? All she was trying to do was protect him and his sister. His sister. He had completely forgotten about her, but he was sure that Marielle was fine. It was Razi that needed the attention right now. The only problem was that he had no idea how to help, but he knew that if he didn’t the consequences could be fatal.
“Is there anyone on the island that can help you? There has to be at least one doctor on this fucking island.” He watched her struggle in pain and then fall. Her behavior was scaring him now and he was starting to panic. It was almost like those helpless soon-to-be fathers trying to help their pregnant wives in labor, only this situation was much worse and wouldn’t have a very happy ending if he didn’t help her fast.
Immediately, he ran toward her and scooped her up in his arms. He didn’t want to give her a chance to protest. “I’ll take you home. Just tell me where you live.” It never occurred to him that he didn’t know where Razier lived until now. In fact, he hadn’t really seen any living quarters except for the hide out. He wouldn’t admit it, but he needed Razier. She was the only one really teaching him how to cope with being on the island and the only one that seemed to understand that he hated neing there…even though he’d blown up at her. He wasn’t about to let her die. “Come on, there has to be someone or something that you didn’t think of.”
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Post by Razier Immori Tempest on Apr 6, 2007 10:00:34 GMT -5
Razier squeaked in surprise as Manuelle picked her up. She clung to him a moment in fear he might drop her. She'd never been picked up by anyone before and it was unexpected. That momentary fear had tightened her chest which already hurt though, making the next wave of pain worse. She didn't blame Manuelle though. He didn't mean it.
He asked her if there was anyone who could help her and then said he'd take her home. Where did she live? What was the easiest way to explain how to get there from the hideout? "Do you know where the angel territory is? Probably not... nevermind. Just head east from here and look for a big floating city-castle thing in the sky." She said. "Once in the Angel Territory look for the biggest tree you can find. That's my house."
That had to sound a little odd to him for sure. A tree was her house. She was used to it, but the mortal world didn't have many homes made inside trees the last she checked. And her house was literally inside the tree. Not in it's branches. The tree was massive - as big as a three story colonial. If not a bit larger. She loved that house more than anything else on the island and it was the only place she felt content.
"There might be healers at the temple, but I don't think any of them are specialized with demon poison. I'll just check my attic at home. My mother might have left something. I've got boxes of stuff up there that I haven't even looked through." Really she just didn't want to make Manuelle go all the way to the temple and she didn't want the people at the temple seeing her like this. They'd fuss and she didn't like being fussed over.
It was bad enough Manuelle had picked her up. She felt helpless laying in his arms in pain. At least standing she felt strong - like she wasn't giving in. Thinking of that she started struggling a little. "And I can walk. So put me down." She said. The struggling made the pain worse, but she just gritted her teeth and pretended she was fine. She could do this. She was strong. She could protect her charges.
Why did she suddenly care if she could protect Marielle and Manuelle though?
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Post by Manuelle Pearce on Apr 6, 2007 16:22:24 GMT -5
The look on Manny’s face when she tried to explain where she lived was priceless. He was so confused and couldn’t really comprehend what she was saying. “Floating city castle thing in the sky? What the hell is that? And you live in a tree? I’m not even going to ask how that’s possible. I’m just going to walk and have you guide me as we go.” He could just imagine a tree house with a ladder hanging down for her to use.
He was just about to get a better grip on her when she requested that he put her down. “If you insist, but I’m coming with you…and if you fall again I’m carrying you the rest of the way, no questions asked.” Gently, he lowered her to the ground and was ready to catch her if she stumbled.
Manny stepped back for her to lead the way to her house. He was anxious to get her home, but he was also curious to see how she lived. Her stuff was probably perfectly organized and spotless. She’d probably kill him if he touched anything.
He couldn’t really understand why he was so concerned or why he was worried. It was because he was a good person. That was it for sure.
OoC: sorry it’s so short. I hate short posts, but I didn’t know what else to write.
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